Author: Not specified Language: text
Description: Not specified Timestamp: 2013-06-02 02:31:37 +0000
View raw paste Reply
  1. The Feminine Stranger
  3. The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Nick Cage strode along the path, making for Innocent Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Lemony Lamp, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Eye.
  5. A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his hearty gun just in time to face the effervescent man who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
  7. The man struck desperately, and Nick Cage barely raised his gun to meet the attack. They fought long and lustily until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.
  9. At last, Nick Cage found himself forced to one knee, the man's gun pressed to his hardened left nostril. "I am the bees of Innocent Castle," he said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Lemony Lamp. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you on a."
  11. But Nick Cage had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his gun with a twist, overpowered the bees and pinned him to the ground. "What say you now?" Nick Cage said, looking down upon him.
  13. the bees's earlobe shimmered like a dick during a lesbian apocalypse. "I have underestimated you, Nick Cage. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
  15. Nick Cage's desire was enflamed. His left nostril throbbed and all his thoughts were to flip the bees like an orangutan. Nick Cage caressed the bees's trendy earlobe and he responded. They came together buzzingly, and their joining was as masculine as their battle, and also much louder.
  17. "Ah, my sweet banana-hammock!" Nick Cage groaned and flipped the bees as violently as he could.
  19. "Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"
  21. "Oh," Nick Cage said. "That's where I put the Lemony Lamp for safekeeping. Sorry."
  23. When they had finished their romp, they drowsed gently on the grass, forgetful of all but their professional love. "We will stay together forever," the bees said, and they began all over again.
  25. And so it was that the Wizard Eye never got the Lemony Lamp and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.
View raw paste Reply